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HomeThe Art of CommunicatingEffective Communication in Marriage

Communication is a process of sending a message through a medium to the receiver. It basically means to pass on or share or exchange views, information, ideas, knowledge, feelings and emotions.

Lack of communication is the cause of most marital problems. There could be a minor or a major information distortion. Lack of communication is the mother of frustrations in a marriage.

Types of Communication

There are two major types of communication:

a. Verbal: This could be in form of discussion, argument, whisper, murmur, rebuke, protest, command, encourage, praise, appeal, gossip, instruct, correct, appreciate, etc.

b. Nonverbal: This could be signs or signals. This could be in form of nose twitching, hissing, door slamming, bunching of legs, clapping, touching, winking of eyes, etc.

Kinds of Communication

1. Zero Communication: This is when there is no communication at all between the couples. When couples are no more in talking term. This show a sign of a family that is about to fall. Lack of communication in the home is a threat to the peaceful existence of the family.

2. Plastic Communication: This is when communication has no root, not sincere, not direct. This shows a sign of a poisoned relationship. Guard your marriage against such communication which does not have its root in total sincerity and faithfulness.

3. Negative Communication: This involves dangerous communication. It involves negative communication like cursing, murmuring, abusing or insulting, protesting, etc.

4. Bulk Communication: This is handling a lot of issues at the same time, thereby confusing the receiver. Thereby affecting the rate of understanding between couples.

5. Half Communication: This is making incomplete statements which could be refer to as half truths.

6. Object Communication: Directing one’s comment to object instead of addressing the subject. For instance, the husband may look at a badly prepared soup and say “You this peppery soup how I wish I had somebody with good sense that can prepare you better, I would have enjoyed you”. By saying this he is passing a message across to the wife that the soup is bad. Though in a wrong way.

7. Subject Communication: This is the situation when a person addresses the subject instead of the object of discussion. The husband of a woman that cooked a bad food may say, “Woman, you have been careless in everything, everything you do in this house is bad” instead of telling the wife how badly the food was prepared, may be peppery, or salty, he is busy castigating the woman. It could not be true, that the woman has never done anything right in that house.

8. Sandwich Communication: This is the level of communication that combines both negative and positive to produce a positive result. It is like commendation, correction and condemnation. For example, “Darling, thank you for this wonderful food. You can just try to reduce the pepper tomorrow; all the same it is a wonderful meal. I always say you are the best cook”. This kind of woman will take to the correction of her husband without any grudges because of the commendation.

9. Extra Mile Communication: This is when a partner goes beyond commendation to sing the praise of his partner calling him beautiful names and telling him how handsome he is. These kinds of communication are missing in our home today that is why we encounter diverse problems in marriages today. Check your own marriage, check the level of communication in your home and change for good. Allow God to use your mouth for the betterment of your home.


Source by Bisi Adewale

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